The visits with the in-laws are over for the weekend & we won't be spending time with them again until the middle of the week. The last few days have been interesting. It's been a manageable visit so far thanks to many lessons learned: stick to your guns, stand up for your family (the one you created) & don't let things slide.
Friday night was the first visit. You would think by now other people in our family have learned some lessons, but it's not so. The original plan was to have the grandparents over to our house after dinner. Aunt Ju-Ju wanted to change it so that we had a pizza dinner at their house. A dinner that Logan couldn't eat because he's allergic to the garlic in the pizza sauce. They should know this by now since we go over this EVERY SINGLE VISIT. Bill had to stand up for Logan, telling Aunt Ju-Ju that he would feel bad eating different food than everyone else, especially since he knows exactly what pizza is (I make him garlic-free pizza at home). So, the plans would stay the same.
The grandparents ended up coming over for about an hour or so. They played with Logan in the playroom downstairs while I nursed Carter in the living room upstairs (I wasn't taking him down there because I haven't made it allergy-free for Carter since that's the cat's hang out). They spent the majority of the time down there. Once they were ready to leave, they came up, held Carter for about a minute (seriously, not much longer than that at all) & went on their way. Grandpa L didn't smoke at all while he was here, a miracle in itself, so I think his lesson finally clicked & Grandma L didn't even attempt to grab at Carter, which I was almost sure would happen. So, lesson learned there.
Saturday we went over to Aunt Ju-Ju's house for dinner - again, a dinner that Logan couldn't have, but he didn't care since he was eating Mac n' Cheese & we were eating meat (he's still pretty much a vegetarian). The kids played together & ran around for hours. I held onto Carter for the night because Logan & Cousin B were running around & would occasionally come over to poke at him. I felt better keeping him safe from a clumsy accident than having someone else try that.
Sunday was Cousin B's 2nd birthday party. We packed a dinner for Logan because once again, a dinner that he couldn't eat was made - but it was a birthday party with 25 other people there, so I figured we were going to have to anyway. I had Carter wrapped up snugly in the Mei Tai wrap before going in. Smartest decision I ever made that night. Uncle J's family is just as bad about respecting boundaries & there were at least five grabby-grandma's that were dying to snatch Carter away to hold all night long. I wasn't keen on the idea of playing "pass the baby" with my 4 week old baby (with people I've met maybe three to five times in the last three years) & the wrap was the best way to get the point across. So, if you don't want to keep hearing "can I hold the baby?" 5o million times & don't want to keep repeating "no" (or risk people just simply taking the baby from your arms without asking) - wraps & slings are where it's at.
So, other than the "mattress incident" (which is just ridiculous now) everything has been relatively easy to deal with, only because we've learned some good lessons.