Saturday, July 21, 2007

Living with a toddler is like...
Chinese water torture. The constant screaming & throwing of fits, the endless temper tantrums, flinging food all over in the kitchen then being hungry afterward, tossing toys into the kitchen with the intent to drive me flat out crazy. It's killing me. Slowly.

The last week has been beyond draining. I've hit my limit. It's gotten to the point where when Logan screams in a fit (for diaper changes, because it's time to brush his teeth, because he's drinking juice & he wanted milk, because he spilled milk, because now he hates Goldfish crackers, because Buddha is barking, because I'm trying to work, because we're at the store & he can't reach the groceries to throw out of the cart, for no apparent reason...) I scream, "Stop screaming"! Seriously. Does that make sense? To scream about not screaming? I'm an idiot.

I've just been worn down over time. My patience with the terrible two's here is paper thin. God forbid this goes on for YEARS because I will just die a slow & painful death in my living room with the Disney Channel playing in the background making my ears bleed. I've noticed that I'm making myself busy with things to do while leaving Logan at home with Bill. I just have to get away. If I don't, with each day that I'm held hostage I get more frustrated & a hell of a lot grumpier. What I really need is a sensory deprivation tank where I can't hear the shrieks & screams, where I can't see the toys strewn about the house or the food stuck & dried to every spot by the highchair, where I can't smell the diaper pail or feel Logan climb all over me, using my chest & the fat on my thighs like rock climbing holds.

I need a mommy vacation.


When writing this, I wanted to cry because living like this totally sucks. But then after reading it, I had to laugh because this is what moms of toddlers complain about all of the time. I read it & thought, "Wait, I've heard this somewhere before. Wait! I've heard this a million times!" It's so cliche, it's humorous.

6 comments:

Jake Silver said...

This past week, my wife and I started counseling and her first advice was for us to seek out Daycare for Tate and get my wife working again. It's very hard to transition and you do feel a little guilty at first, especially the Mommie part... but it is going really well and we feel it is just as good for Tate to be around the other kids as it is for Jes to be working. Just a thought because what you describe with Logan is so similar to what she was telling me. She was saying everyday is the same, just trying to entertain him for hours on end while trying to clean the house and wonder "what are we going to do today?" and then he would nap and that would be her only break. I don't post this to tell you what to do, I'm very wary of giving "One Size Fits All Advice..." to other parents. But as I've noted before, our families seem very similar in terms of kids' ages, and marriage lengths and the way we raise our kids... so all I'm saying is it is working wonders for everyone around here in only a week. Plus it makes the time you DO spend with your tot (the evenings and weekends) that much more special.

Erin said...

I know how you feel. Hailey has finally hit that point I think. I feel bad, because I feel like I'm not with her all day, I should be able to handle the times I am with her...but I just can't sometimes. I can't imagine working from home like you do and having to put up with that 24 hrs a day 7 days a week. I would go INSANE. And my ultimate goal is to be a SAHM!?! I'm feeling pretty crappy about the whole situation right now actually...I was going to blog about it later when I have some time. I too resort to yelling at Hailey "THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU, BE QUIET!!!" Yea like that does any good... anyway, thanks for letting me know I'm not alone, again...

angie said...

Oh. My. Goodness.

My exact feelings. I haven't been blogging much lately because I can't get a free moment to sit down & write, unless it's after she's gone to bed and then I have a million things to do that she didn't let me do while she was awake!! It's draining and tiring, and I to have been finding excuses to leave Ava behind with daddy while I get out for a moments peace, even if it's only to run out to the local WalMart!

This is definitely a rough age, and makes me think twice before having another!! I had given it some serious thought, and thought we were going to go for it. Then last week I went back on the pill, LoL. I just can't do it yet!!!!!

Dawn B said...

OH gosh I feel ya girl. I feel ya. Just like "Angie" said. I have a hard time even getting time to update our blog, let alone have a free moment to myself. I feel bad for the little guy sometimes. He's so frustrated because he can't get what he wants because he can't communicate the way he wants. And it's frustrating for me and his daddy too. ARGH. And with all of the changes going on..we're packing getting ready to move, his baby sister still freaks him out, etc. I keep having a hard time picking the right battles with him. And he keeps wanting to throw everything too!!! OH gosh, and the climbing. He has just mastered climbing on the couch. So I spend the whole day trying to keep his head from being dented. lol Well, that and trying to find time to pack. Anywho, thank you for the heartfelt post. Everyone says that it gets easier. It has too. lol

Mof2 said...

I am with you...Pumpkin has hit the terrible two's. Isn't that what it's called when nothing goes their way and they just pitch that lovely fit wether your at home or in the store. It's her way or she will pitch a fit about it. It's horrible. I feel like running away and just balling my eyes out sometimes, but then I remember, my child isn't the only one right this minute that is falling out on the floor screaming and hollaring because she wanted crackers and not cheerios and because she wanted to walk and not sit in the shopping cart. Although I can say she isn't the only one at that moment in time, I feel like I am the only mother who just wants to scream and cry right along with her.

brandy said...

I laugh because I found this while I was searching for answers on why one of my 21-month old TWIN daughters has been screaming right now for an hour & 1/2 in her crib (it's nap time). Neither one of them are like this, EVER, and I checked to make sure she didn't feel hot or had something wrong with her. I also go crazy and having two of them makes me feel completely insane sometimes. I especially love it (insert sarcasm) when they are both whining and pushing/pulling on me for no apparent reason. I do freelance work while they are napping to stay "connected" but it's hard to work when I hear one screaming from two floors up... I just have to say..."this too shall pass"... It IS funny how all of this sounds stupid when I write it because I'm not the only one in the world raising toddler twins. But I swear, sometimes I feel like it...