Nothing has changed, nothing has happened. I talked to Bill on his lunch break & we laughed about when I was unknowingly pregnant with Logan (because I hadn't "missed" anything yet), drinking beer & riding roller coasters. Everyone but me was convinced that I was pregnant. "You're going to scramble that baby if you ride the roller coaster!" a co-worked yelled to me while waiting in line at the amusement park. Although Logan turned out fine, I'm continuing to skip out on coffee & cocktails until I have a definite answer. I'm going out with friends tonight for dinner, half of them in a different playgroup so they haven't yet heard about the "group test". I'm sure when I drink my lemon water rather than a beer, someone will notice & say something. However, I will not be peeing on a stick in a Mexican restaurant.
Since nothing has happened to give a definite "not pregnant" answer, there's still the constant thinking about it. The more I think about it, the more I want a positive test. I'm still not keen on the idea of being sick forever, but I have a great group of friends that would totally help me out. One of our playgroup members went into pre-term labor & her water broke at 26 weeks. She's now in the hospital on bed rest for at least 4 weeks. The Club is pulling together to get her magazines & other things to keep her busy. Phone calls & visits are made regularly & I'm organizing lunch visits without the kids so 3 or 4 moms can go & play board games with her. I know if I needed help, they would be more than happy to do so.
If I am pregnant, life isn't going to shift as much as it did with Logan. Back then, we just bought a house & then all of a sudden went to being a one-income family. We have a lot of the things we would need (car seat, crib, bassinet) & we wouldn't have the same decrease of income. Minus any health complications, this transition would be relatively easy. In talking about this with Bill this afternoon, he said that he wasn't stressed about it (coming from the guy who stresses about EVERYTHING) & he actually sounded excited.
If my cycle starts & it's obviously clear that we aren't expecting, I think it's time that Bill & I sit down & talk about trying in January.