Bill's parents came back this week/weekend for another visit. They are on their first road trip as retired people, so they drove through Colorado for a visit during the first half & then came back again on their way home. This visit was a little more stressful than the last.
For some reason or another, Grandpa L thinks it's OK to smoke around Logan. I don't know where he got this idea because the "smoking rule" from day one was that he had to wash his hands & change his clothes if he wanted to hold Logan when he was a baby, to which Grandpa L decided that he just wouldn't hold him (nice, huh). The rules have never changed, however, he's been testing the limits at each visit as the years go by. It started with him lighting up while we were out walking around Downtown this last spring. Then there was the last visit where I had to keep telling Logan to stay away from Grandpa while he smoked in our backyard (which really made me angry).
This last Friday they came over for dinner. Grandma L was cutting up some fruit in the kitchen, Bill, Logan & Grandpa L were in the backyard grilling the burgers. I looked out of the sliding glass door & did a triple take. Grandpa L was standing by the grill & Logan was less than three feet away from his smoldering cigarette. I yelled to Logan from across the yard to come inside & to stay away from Grandpa while he smoked (he should be smoking in the front yard anyway - away from everyone). Grandpa L then has the balls to tell me, "It's OK. The wind is blowing in the other direction. He's fine because he's upwind". I almost lost it. "I don't care where the wind is blowing, it's too close for my comfort", I told him with much restraint. I then brought Logan inside while trying to heard him away from Grandpa L. After that, I guess Bill said something to him but I'm not sure what, but to the effect of don't smoke around our kids, I'm guessing.
So, for the rest of the visit Grandpa L was pissed because I don't want him smoking around us. I never told him he couldn't smoke (that's like telling the sun not to shine) & he has a place where he can go out of view & away from Logan in the driveway or the front yard. If this come up again in the next visit in October (after Carter is born), I will not hold back as much as I did this time.
The rest of the in-laws were their usual selves, Aunt Ju-Ju not being able to commit to a time & place for lunch, ultimately screwing up Bill's lunch hour & Grandma L being fake & also making some kind of interesting statements, comparing Logan to Cousin B (whatever). Nothing to open my mouth over.
Interestingly enough, the info-train with them has come to a complete stop. Since this is the last visit until after Carter is born, they still have not seen an ultrasound, they have no clue about the trip to labor & delivery a couple of weeks ago & they don't know that I'm measuring 4 weeks behind & need to go in tomorrow for another ultrasound. All they know is that we're having Carter at the end of September (hopefully not sooner). Maybe it would have been different if they actually tried to change the relationship, made a real apology, making an effort to respect our parenting choices & not being so cruel to me behind my back.