Getting emotional
Now that we really are getting close to Carter's arrival, I'm beginning to get more choked up & teary-eyed at thought & preparation that I've been doing. I've been getting all of our pictures organized to get ready for the onslaught of newborn pictures that we're going to take, we're cleaning out the garage this weekend, I'm going to clean out the car, we'll get our closets purged & organized & the purchase final bits & pieces of things that we need to get for Carter (diapers, pick out a coming home outfit, etc). I'm also going to get the hospital bag packed & Logan's potential overnight bag packed too.

One thing that I am so excited about is our coming home party that I'm also getting ready for. It is SO IMPORTANT to me that we have some very special family time when we come home from the hospital, especially since I missed out on those moments with Logan. I do want it to be kind of a big deal without much effort. I'd rather not just come home with an anti-climactic feeling of "now what" or just going back to business as usual. So, we're going to have a little birthday party, or more like a family celebration. At the baby shower, one of my friends bought Logan the cutest "Big Brother" shirts that he'll wear & I'm going to make some cupcakes to freeze ahead of time. All Bill will have to do before picking us up is remembering to thaw out the cupcakes & possibly getting Logan a balloon. So, nothing extravagant, but simple & special (now I need some kleenex).

It's unbelievable that we are so close to becoming a family of four, a family with two boys. The pregnancy will be over with & I'll (hopefully) never have to worry about living with hyperemesis again. There are so many feelings, everything from excitement & anticipation to fear & doubt. But right now? Just thinking about our family makes me so happy & I can't wait for our littlest guy to join us.

TERM!!
Sorry to make everyone sit on the edge of their seats waiting for an update, but there's no Big News. We've made it to 37 weeks, so now Carter can come out without much worry. At my last OB appointment this week I was measuring two weeks behind & needed another ultrasound to see if fluid levels were OK. I went in yesterday & everything is fine. Plenty of fluid & Carter is measuring right on track. He's estimated to weigh about 6 pounds & something ounces right now, about the 40th percentile. I guess I'm just good at hiding babies.

The ultrasound technician was the same woman who did our 3D ultrasound & she remembered me & our stubborn little baby who didn't want to get his picture taken. She tried her hardest to get some extra pictures for me. Carter was being just as stubborn as he was during all of the other ultrasounds, but she did get an AWESOME picture that I just LOVE. Carter was flexing his bicep! This kid has guns on him already, no joke. His bicep has a baby peak & his forearms are pretty solid, too. We laughed when we saw this on the screen & I had to laugh even harder being a personal trainer. The technician wasn't surprised that I had been pulverized from the inside for the entire pregnancy as his picture not only shows him flexing, but in a boxer stance, ready to use my liver as a punching bag & on his tip toes with the ball of his foot pushing deep & hard on my ribs (again). I often referred to Logan as my little Olympic soccer player when he kicked the crap out of me, Carter is my little boxer.

Here is the 37th week belly picture overload & as usual, Logan was being especially cute (why he can't have this attitude during professional sessions is beyond me).

Ready for Carter to come out


Measuring small, but feeling huge


CUTE!


Hugs for Carter


Super Cute!

Moving along
I think I may be right about Carter's early arrival. I had an OB visit this morning & was checked. Since the trip to labor & delivery on Friday night, there's been some progress. Not a lot, but some. Before the weekend, I was a finger tip dilated (whatever that's really supposed to mean - less than a centimeter, I guess). Carter, while head down, was still kind of high & so was my cervix.

Now, I'm 1 to 1.5cm's dilated, 70% effaced & Carter is low. Low enough that I'm measuring small again & need to go in for another ultrasound on Thursday just to make sure there's not a decrease in fluid. He either needs to come before the 5th or after the 15th. My OB is going on vacation on the 5th & I'm going out for dinner for Moms Night Out on the 15th (Melting Pot! YUM!). I've got a sinking suspicion that he's probably going to be born somewhere in there though.

Holy Crap! It's crunch time!!!!

The lone ranger
I'm a little nervous. I probably shouldn't be & everything will be OK, but Bill is leaving for a business trip in the morning & will be gone for the next day & a half (two days?). While I'm having contractions on a regular basis throughout the day, he'll be halfway across the country - Portland, no less.

First & foremost, I am VERY jealous. I miss Portland badly & want to go back for a visit as much as I want to eat ice cream every night. We're hoping to take a family vacation there this summer, so it's not a far off dream, but still. I want to go. But not while pregnant. Because I can't eat the sushi or drink the beer. On the other hand, it would suck more than anything to go into labor while he's gone. Not saying that I think it will happen, but with our luck - you never know. I'm so glad I have a lot of friends that I can call for labor support & child care if anything like that should happen.

However, I am slightly anxious about taking care of Logan all by myself from sun up to sun down for the next two days. Bill's been getting up early to take of Logan's breakfast & getting him bathed & into bed at night (because it hurts me to do so). This is a time where I think to myself, "how on earth do single pregnant mothers do it". I am exhausted as it is, I can't put on my own shoes without sounding like a grunting jungle animal & getting through Logan's bath time routine should result in me being awarded a gold medal. Or something like that.

I hope the next couple of days go by quickly & painlessly.

Spreading the love

At the end of last week, Dawn let me know how much she enjoyed this little blog here by sending on over the "I love Your Blog" award. I love reading hers too & have been reading since before James was born, who is the same age as Logan. Three years is a long time to read a blog & keep up with a family! She's been a big source of positivity in her comments & in her posts on her blog about the challenges her family faces throughout the years. Someone I should take some notes from!

When I first started reading "mommy blogs", it was a great way to peek into the world of other bloggers living similar lives, being pregnant & first time mothers. Pearls of wisdom were found & appreciated, but mostly, friendships were made from around the world. Over the years I've kept up with all of my original favorites, reading about their kids growing up from babies to preschoolers, watching families grow from one to two kids. I've read about life struggles, blogging ruts & personal triumphs. It's amazing how you get to know someone through their blog.

So, without further ado, I'm passing this on to all of the blogs that I've kept up with from the beginning. While I may not comment as often as I used to, I still read daily & I probably always will until the end. I still love all of the "newer" blogs that I've been reading & have added to my link list, but the original blogs will always hold a special place in my heart. Be warned, this list may be a bit long. I guess there's a lot of love to spread!


2 Pink Lines
Reesh had Lily on the same day I had Logan. I remember reading her birth story as I was in early labor, so excited for her & not knowing I was going to be in the same situation shortly there after. Since then, she had another daughter (Nadia) & has started up a smoothie business with her sister, so she's super busy & I miss her frequent posts.

Girl From Florida
I've read GFF grow so much as a woman over the years, often moving away from friends & family & having to re-root herself with her incredibly adorable daughter, Amelia. I admire her ability to juggle both motherhood & work & am envious of her scholastic achievements. She's one freakin' smart cookie! I also love her pictures & her passion for good food.

Hilarities Ensue
I love Liz. She's great, smart & her writing is something I look forward to everyday. And, I'm sure if we had met pre-kids at a Phish lot or some other concert, we would have had a great time. Not many other moms share the same taste in music as we do in this house! I also remember her son's birthday shortly after Logan was born & Liz has been a wonderful source of advice (not assvice) throughout the years.

Hola, Isabel
Reading her blog often reminds me of how much I miss living in the Pacific Northwest (rain & all!). With a newborn Logan on my lap, I remember reading about the arrival of Babboo. I've also been amazed at the skills of her husband who built their house with his own two hands. Amazing.

It's all about Paisley
P is one cute kid. I mean, C-U-T-E, kind of cute. She has as much spunk as Logan & I think it would be HILARIOUS if the two of them should ever meet. Ashley has been through a lot since motherhood & is a great source of inspiration to keep doing what you've got to do.

JezeWhiz
From "mommy blog" morphed to more of a food blog, I will always be an avid reader no matter what direction she takes her writing. Al & Logan are only a few months apart & much like the other blogs, I remember the day he was born. I love her style, love of food & love reading about how she tries to balance that with a fitness goal, motherhood & work.

Mommy Musings
Although her oldest son is a little bit older than Logan, I've been readings Jen's blog for some time. We share a lot of similarities in our lives from our wacky-crazy in-laws to living through our pregnancies with hyperemesis. We've had many phone calls & novel length emails about things going on in our lives & I'm thankful that she's there to lend a listening ear (or eye). And sorry, she's private (for very good reason!).

Our Sweet Little Girl
One of the private blogs on my list, unfortunately you won't get the chance to read about a super cute girly-girl. However, addicted from the beginning (& before she went private) it's been so fun to watch how our kids have grown & how much boys are innately different than girls. As different as the gender extremes of our children are, they still share similar personalities & it's great to read about another mom going through the same preschooler shenanigans that we go through.

The Boyd Girls
Caroline & Logan are the same age & it's been fun reading how their family has grown from one to two little girls. Keri is a very creative mom, finding so many activities to do to keep her kids entertained throughout the day. I often read what they've done thinking to myself, "Why didn't I think of that!".

The Three Apostles
I really like Erica's sense of humor, dry & sarcastic, I totally get it. Kira is the same age as Logan, but by reading her blog you would think Kira is much older - she's sharp as a tack. I also think it's kind of crazy how our first kids are so close in age & now our second pregnancies are on the same time line too. She's one that I'll be reading for a long time to come.


Thanks for the years of support through comments & sharing your lives on your own blogs!!!

Strike a pose
Since this is going to be our last baby & I will never (hopefully) be pregnant again, it's important to me to record as many memories of pregnancy as I can. The one aspect I missed with Logan was belly shots. I got a few towards the end, taking a picture by month, but nothing compared to the weekly/bi-weekly pictures I've been taking with Carter. The other photographic evidence I missed out on was a maternity photo shoot, because, let's face it - they aren't cheap & we didn't have the funds to even think about it with Logan.

Photographer friend has been one of my most awesome friends ever. From helping take care of Logan during our trips to labor & delivery, listening to me cry about random stressors, sharing our pregnancies & losses (she's pregnant again after a loss), hosting a baby shower for me, going out for a lunch that saved my life while I was sick, to taking our family portraits for free - including all of our prints (custom designed announcements & holiday cards, too). This morning we went over to her house/studio for my maternity session. With everything she's done & continues to do - I don't know how to thank her enough.

The session this morning was fun, even with Logan screaming his head off again. I don't know what's up with that boy, but every photo shoot we have, he melts down & is the most difficult subject to photograph. It wasn't important that he be in many of the shots this time, so it was a whole lot less stressful. I think we got maybe one or two with him, more of Bill & myself together & after that, they went upstairs to watch Sponge Bob with Little M while I did the belly shots & more "artistic" poses.

This is the great thing about having your pictures taken by a professional - you have great lighting & they have the photoshop skills to edit out ugly stretch marks (which, YES, I have requested for professional pictures). You are photographed in ways that you could never do on your own, with props (fans & sheer wraps!) & really, you look like a completely different person compared to the snaps shots you take with your point & shoot at home. Professional photographers make you look amazing.

She showed me a couple on her view screen & they looked so nice. I can't wait to see what she has after she goes through the proofing & editing. As much as I feel like a fat cow, I know that the pictures she took are beautiful & I will cherish how my pregnant body looked for years to come.

Baby Shower!
This morning was my baby shower, hosted by photographer friend. There was a huge turn out with most of The Club in attendance (which was flattering) & lots & lots of yummy food to snack on. She picked up an ice cream cake from Cold Stone - chocolate cake with coffee ice cream, chocolate gnash frosting & almonds on top. Oh, so yummy. We had a great time just chatting, hanging out & grazing on the buffet of food. We didn't play any games - I said it wasn't necessary since I think they're kind of cheesy. The kids had a lot of fun playing outside in the back yard. We were really lucky to have such beautiful weather.

There were about 20 people there & more kids since almost everyone has two. It was a full house & everyone was so thoughtful & generous with their gifts. I felt INCREDIBLY lucky to have found such a great Club & to have made so many wonderful friends. I can't imagine what I would do without some of my closest friends that I've made (photographer friend & massage friend, for sure).

There were pictures taken, but not by me - I'll post them when I get them.

Back again
All day today I had felt "off". I was crampy, tired, slow-moving. I just didn't feel right & it reminded me of how I felt when I was in early labor with Logan. I didn't do anything about it, going about my business, keeping appointments & doing some shopping.

Later in the evening, I had to go to an emergency board meeting for The Club. Remember Playgroup Nazi? Well, she was back to her old antics & we were trying to figure out how to terminate her membership. We had to revise our Code of Conduct to include phrases like "All members must treat each other with courtesy & respect", "NO foul language at activities" & common sense things that all adults should automatically do. How sad is that!? On my way over there, my contractions were getting worse. During the meeting, I was propped up on the couch with a pillow under my knees & drinking water. Some of the contractions got strong enough to make we worry & my friends could see how uncomfortable I was by the look on my face. We all started to get worried.

I called my OB (or the triage nurse because it was after hours) while we timed the contractions. Each of them were a minute long & 5 minutes apart. The nurses were so busy that I had to leave a message. After much discussion about what to do, we finally decided that I would drive home & massage friends would follow me to make sure I was OK. I got home & waited for the nurse to call me back. I knew I wasn't in active labor, but possibly early labor (which could last for a couple of days if it was anything like it was with Logan). The nurse called back & said that I had to go to labor & delivery no matter what because I was still only 36 weeks along & considered pre-term.

We packed Logan up in the middle of the night, again, & took him over to photographer friends house for another sleep over. This time while still a little upset, was not as traumatic for him like the first time.

We got labor & delivery with the contractions still going & the ER staff commenting on how small my belly was. We got set up in a labor suite (we were in triage last time & the suites are really nice), got hooked up to the monitors & waited for the on-call Doctor to see how things were progressing. The contractions were registering on the monitor, but I wasn't dilating - which was a good thing, sort of. Even though I'm having contractions that are uncomfortable & at the spaced time that requires a trip to labor & delivery, I'm not supposed to go back until either my water breaks or until the contractions are strong enough to make me stop breathing & talking. Just like with Logan.

So, now I continue to have strong, uncomfortable contractions every 5 minutes or so & I have to just deal with it until I'm practically dying for my epidural. They are strong enough to wake me up in the middle of the night, too. Craziness.

Logan, however, had a great time at his sleepover. He & Little M stayed up chatting & playing with some toys & dressing up. Little M eventually got tired & left her room to ask photographer friend to talk to him because he wouldn't stop & go to sleep. That is hilarious! So, the next time I go to labor & delivery, when it's the REAL thing, I am not the least bit worried about how Logan will do if we have to drop him off in the middle of the night (again), which I'm almost certain will happen.

The end of summer
All of the kids have gone back to school this week, the weather has been gradually getting cooler & bikini season is officially over. Oddly, this year I really liked bikini season while being pregnant (before stretch marks got a little crazy). I guess it's more fun to wear when your stomach is supposed to be big. I would have never gone without the board shorts though because my butt looks horrific at this point. This is probably the last time I'll wear this number again until next summer (when I better be at pre-pregnancy size).

35 weeks pregnant


Belly Hugs

New hair cuts & cute smiles

I don't know where this came from
Logan has a full blown phobia that has come out of nowhere. He is really afraid of dogs. Like, panics & freaks out kind of afraid & I have no idea why.

Over the last few months I've noticed his fear of dogs increasing. He's certainly not afraid of Buddha (I often have to yell at him to leave the poor dog alone), but other people's dogs? That's a totally different story. Even dogs he knows & sees often at friend's houses. As we walk up the driveway to knock on their door, he'll talk about how he's scared of the dog & doesn't want to go in. I have to reassure him that it's alright & that the dogs are nice & he'll be fine. He's never been bit, but has been jumped on by a small dog (smaller than Buddha). This is the only reason I can pin point.

Last week we were at a babysitting co-op meeting at a members house. The kids were out in the back yard playing while all of the moms hung out in the kitchen & chatted while snacking (the usual things we do). The next thing I know, someone tells me that Logan is freaking out on the deck. I turn around & look out of the sliding glass door to see him in a full panic, running, screaming, frantically trying to get away from a very mellow black Lab. The boy was climbing on top of the picnic table & if he were strong enough, I have no doubt that he would have scaled a wall to get away. He was that afraid.

I ran out & scooped him up, telling him that it was alright, the dog was nice & he's safe. Everything was OK & he could calm down. I carried him inside & he sat on my lap to relax for a while. He did, but did not want to go outside until the dog was gone. The mom brought the dog inside & put them in the kennel & even then, Logan was getting upset that the dog was in the next room. I had never seen him this scared in his life!

This afternoon we went out for ice cream with some friends downtown right where Bill works. After everyone left, Logan & I hung out waiting for Bill to get off. While we played on the kids play structure, another mom with an older kid & a small Jack Russel Terrier on a leash came over to play. Immediately, Logan ran away. I told him that it was OK, the dog was on a leash & wasn't going to get anywhere near him. I also told him that the dog was nice & he didn't have to worry. He still kept his distance. The other mom & I chatted a bit while the kids played & while she gave Logan permission to pet her dog, he refused. Thirty minutes later, he inched closer, smiled at the dog & looked from afar, but didn't want to pet him at all.

I've never told him that dogs are scary. I've taught him long ago that he can't just walk up to strange dogs, he has to have permission & when he does, he's to hold out his hand so the dog can sniff him first. I don't think I've ever told him that dogs bite (except for Buddha & Kitty when they are mad at him for teasing them - even then, this doesn't phase him & he thinks it's funny). So, it's not like I've instilled fear in him. I just don't know why he is so afraid of them. Maybe this is just a normal phase that he'll grow out of. I really hope so because I hate to see him so terrified. It's completely traumatizing to him.

Place your bets
This afternoon I had an appointment with my OB. It started out as a typical visit with the Group B Strep test (I'll find out results later). The Doctor also checked my cervix to see what was going on. Carter is head down, cervix is still high, but I'm already a fingertip dilated. Now, this really doesn't mean anything other than things are changing. They could be fast or slow changes. Often times, women walk around at 2cms dilated for weeks. But, things are moving along either way! My only rule is that Carter has to stay in until 37 weeks. I'm thinking he'll be born at 38.

Another thing that was brought up (by me) in this appointment was anti-depressants. Now, I don't typically ask for comments on here but now I am...

This pregnancy has been the most stressful eight months that I've had in a very, very, very long time (other than when we were dealing with the in-laws). Looking back to after Logan was born, I'm pretty sure I had undiagnosed post-partum depression & I know that dealing with Bill's family was the catalyst that took me there. I wasn't on any medication at the time & even though I was still able to take care of Logan, it was a horrible first year & I cried all of the time (for VERY good reason). The only reason nothing was done about it was because there was reason to be depressed & I never realized that "Life Crap" could bring on PPD. To be frank, I'm depressed now (not too bad, but again, for VERY good reason) & I'm afraid that extenuating circumstances will bring on PPD again.

So, because the depression on both accounts have been because of events & circumstances & not chemical/hormonal imbalances, I'm unsure if I should start medication. I don't feel out of control, but extremely stressed out which does effect me & every single other person in the family. We're working on the issues at hand & although it will take time to fix, we'll get there eventually just probably not before Carter is born.

My OB is leaving the decision up to me. I'm not a big fan of medication, especially anti-depressants in this situation ONLY because depression is happening because of life crap that is going on. If I take the medication, it won't "fix" the problem per say, so I don't see what the point would be.

I just don't know what to do. I'm definitely not at rock bottom, I've been through much deeper bouts of depression unmedicated & made out alright (like after Logan was born), but I don't want to make the mistake of not thinking about this seriously & all of a sudden finding myself in a black hole (especially if Life Crap gets worse). I'm really confused about it all right now.

I would really love to read comments about anyone's experiences with PPD & medication, especially if it was brought on by difficult things happening in life at the time.

2 1/2 years old

My baby is no longer a baby, no longer a toddler & quickly growing up to be a big boy - a preschooler, doing things all by himself. His growth & development over the last seven months has been amazing & watching him live his happy little life has been both challenging & heartwarming all in the same moment.

Logan has turned into quite the early bird, waking up at 6am. Because our bedtime battles with him escaping from his room repeatedly were exhausting, frustrating & going nowhere, we put up the baby gate along his door jam so he can't get out. When he wakes up in the morning, he calls for us now rather than slamming his door a million times or throwing all of his toys out into the hallway. He has grown tall enough to reach the door knob to Carter's room, so we'll see how that works out.
He continues to be a great napper, taking one huge long nap almost everyday from 1 to almost 4. I LOVE that he still naps this long, since it gives me some time to sleep too. I hope he continues this trend for a while after Carter is born so we can ALL take long naps at the same time. I don't think he'll outgrow this too soon since he is such an active little kid & wears himself out regularly.

He is still the pickiest eater I've ever known. He'll eat meat every now & then, but I would still consider him to be vegetarian. We are stuck in a major food rut as he wants to eat the same things everyday (which is normal, I guess). For breakfast he has a glass of milk, a banana & a cereal bar. His snacks are banana chips (monkey chips), raisins, goldfish crackers, peanuts & graham crackers (bee crackers). For lunch it's either a cheese sandwich or peanut butter & jelly sandwich with fruit (he loves all fruit) & veggies (usually peas). Dinner is either the same thing, home-made mac n' cheese (the healthy kind) with veggies or hamburgers that we have to call "Crabby Patties" & tell him that Sponge Bob made so he'll eat it. Although, he has no problem asking for "fries for dinner" every single night.

He loves going to school to "make pictures" & wants me to sing "the wheels on the bus" often. I love the way he says "round & round" while doing the hand motion. It is so, so cute. When not asking to go to school, he asks to go to the gym to play with his friends, or asks to go to specific friends houses. He is a busy body that needs something to do every day, all day. Downtime to him is boring & he often gets into trouble when he's bored & looking for something to do.

At home he is still fascinated with cars or anything with wheels, really. He looks for bugs in the yard, plays with his actions figures & somehow loves Spiderman (which we've never watched or played with). We still watch Sponge Bob religiously, as well as Yo Gaba Gaba (again) & now, The Simpsons (thanks to Bill). If he's not driving his cars across every surface in the house, or playing pretend (& I don't know what he's pretending to do most of the time), he's torturing our poor, patient pets, chasing them around the house & trying to sit on them. It's amazing he hasn't been bit yet, & it's astounding how many times I yell, "LEAVE THE DOG/CAT ALONE"!
He is starting to talk more & more everyday in full sentences. He often asks, "What's that Mommy/Daddy?" to everything he sees, whines "but I don't want to", & has caught me off guard by asking, "Mommy, can I have my milk please?" He loves to talk about how the "ambulance takes hurt people to the doctor" or "police car takes people to jail". He is also in the "mine" phase, where he has to claim everything as his, even his friends toys. This stage is beyond annoying.

He is very good about getting his shoes on by himself, even on the right foot. That's about all he can do to dress himself right now, since pants/shorts are the next thing we'll work on. He has lost interest in potty training, partly because I probably kept asking him if he wanted to go everyday. Now it's become a power struggle. I still ask, but I leave it at that & only talk about it at diaper changes. He knows that he gets candy if he poops on the potty & now we've upped the ante by telling him that if he poops on the potty, he will get a very big special surprise car (a General Lee car that the grandparents bought him that we saved since he got other Big Cars during their last visit).

Temper tantrums have been decreasing in frequency & talking back has begun to take it's place. So, he's still in timeout occasionally, but it's more for grunting a gruff huff when he's in trouble while pointing his finger at me. Or yelling at me. Or sometimes both. We certainly are heading into the "Terrifying Three's", or at least that's what it feels like.

We had a lot of fun learning to swim this summer & his arm floaties were a hit. We've been working with him on trying to peddle his tricycle, but I think it might take some more time to get the hang of that. However, the kid has an arm on him & learned how to throw discs around just like his Dad. Soon, he'll be tagging along with Bill across the disc golf course with his own bag of discs.

He is learning about chores & helping out around the house. He throws trash away for me, cleans up his toys (occasionally), puts his dishes in the sink, clothes in the hamper & helps Bill pick up dog poop in the back yard (he's the poop finder & points it out. Pretty cute, if you ask me). I think in the next year, we'll start his chore chart. Maybe even sooner than that!

It is just shocking how much he has grown & how fast he continues to grow. I didn't think it was possible, but he gets even more cute as the days go by. He is sweet & very loving, giving us hugs & kisses & cuddles everyday, all day. Hearing his giggles & shrieks of laughter just make me smile on the crappiest of days. He loves to be happy & make everyone around him smile. I am so incredibly proud of the boy he's growing up to be. I love my sweetie pea more than life itself.

Weekend Bullets (because they work)
I've finally hit the wall enough where I feel like my muscles are made of a slow-setting cement. My brain hasn't been clear, I just want to sleep & it has nothing to do with the summer (yeah for central air!) but everything to do with being so close to the end of the pregnancy. So, here's some bullets!

• Logan got stung by a yellow jacket for the first time on Friday. We have a BIG problem with a HUGE nest under the back deck & have tried everything other than an exterminator (which is our next step). We tell him often that "bee's bite" & to leave them alone. Well, I think he tried to pick one up & it stung the inside of his thumb. He cried for a short amount of time (shockingly) & his thumb swelled up pretty good. He was very good & sat on the couch with me to cuddle & ice his thumb to get the swelling down. We are very thankful that he didn't have a more severe reaction considering his allergy history.
• Logan is definitely a growing boy. He is going through a growth spurt & is increasingly clumsy. He's tripped over his own feet, walked into walls & is covered in a new batch of bruises, cuts, scrapes & gouges.
• I slept pretty much all day on Saturday. Bill let me sleep in really late (9:30!), then he took a nap while I took care of Logan the rest of the morning. When it was time for Logan's nap, I took one too & we slept for three & a half hours. I really needed the rest!
• Hyperemesis seems to be making a comeback. On Saturday I had to up my meds because I lost my lunch. Oddly, getting sick & tossing my cookies no longer bothers me. It's old hat. Kind of sad now that I think about it. And gross.
• I've been trying to take it easy these last couple of weeks, but have found that a whole day alone with Logan doing nothing is enormously much more stressful for me. So, on the days we have nothing going on I've been calling friends for playdates, which has been great. Logan can run off some energy with a pal & I can kick it & chat with my friends on their couch.

More interesting posts to come this week as I clear the fog from my head (yeah, right!)

Misty-eyed with pictures
I've really been trying to help Logan get prepared & excited for Carter's arrival. We ask him about his little brother, if he's going to be a good Big Brother & help me out, ask him if he knows his little brother's name ("Sister!") & really just talk about Carter often.

Logan seems to be getting more & more excited as time goes on. He's fascinated with babies (& we've had quite a few born in The Club this year) & he smiles at them when they are in their infant seats. This morning at playgroup we had four babies, all younger brother/sisters of Logan's friends; a five month old, a four month old, a twelve week old & a three week old. He was curious about them all & happy that they were at playgroup with his pals. It was pretty cute. At the end while everyone was getting packed up & ready to leave, Logan went over & looked at one of the babies on the couch. "That's a nice baby", he said. Talk about adorable.

After playgroup I decided to find some videos of newborns so he could see what Carter would look like when he came home from the hospital. Logan sat with me excitedly, watching babies on the laptop. "Babies!", he shouted. "Baby sister! That's Carter!". Then he leaned over & patted my belly & gave his little brother a big hug. It melted my heart & of course I got teary & choked up.

On that note, here are the latest pictures of our little guy waiting for his Big Day at 33 weeks...

Brilliant Blogger 2008
I am tired, sore, have heart burn like no other & just feel blah (usual pregnancy stuff), so this tag by Courtney is awesome timing.

A. Attached or Single? Attached
B. Best Friend? Photographer Friend & Massage Friend
C. Cake or Pie? I have to pick. Seriously? BOTH!
D. Day of Choice? Saturday
E. Essential Item? Dishwasher
F. Favorite Color? Green? I have too many
G. Gummy Bears or Worms? YUCK! Neither!
H. Hometown? Salt Lake
I. Indulgence? Hot fudge Sundaes
J. January or July? July
K. Kids? 2
L. Life isn't complete without? Family (not extended!)
M. Marriage Date? June 6, 1999
N. Number of brothers & sisters? 3 younger sisters
O. Oranges or Apples? Oranges
P. Phobias? Haunted Houses like the "fun" ones on Halloween
Q. Quotes? Not sure
R. Reasons to smile? The kids
S. Season of Choice? Fall
T. Tag seven others below.
U. Unknown fact about me? I don't know how to drive a stick shift
V. Vegetable? Peas
W. Worst Habits? Biting my nails
X. X-Ray or Ultrasound? Ultrasound. What exactly is this supposed to mean?
Y. Your favorite food? Sushi
Z. Zodiac Sign? Aries

I'm supposed to tag 7 other people. How about whoever needs some blog fodder goes for it.

I think everything is OK
This afternoon I had my ultrasound to see what's going on & why I'm measuring four weeks behind. I wasn't too nervous because all week long I haven't been thinking about it (other than Googling some stuff after I came home from my last OB appointment). I pretty much told myself that if anything is wrong, there's nothing I can do about it right now & worrying will only send me to labor & delivery for another shot to stop contractions. So, ignoring the fact that there might be something to worry about seemed to work (gee, no wonder why Bill does this coping skill so often).

The ultrasound technician was really nice. We chatted a bit & joked about raising boys. Then she got to measuring. She measured Carters head & I didn't notice any movement. I held my breath while she was telling me the anatomy that she was looking for. She moved the wand & I saw Carter's heart beating, giving me a rush of relief that I felt all the way down to my toes. She then tried to measure his abdomen. This took quite a while with a very long moment of dead silence, concentrated, quizzical looks & many re-measurements. This is where I began to worry again. I stayed silent, watching the screen until the technician told me that since there was little room for Carter to move around, it was difficult to get an accurate measurement. I just nodded.

She then moved on to his femur, which was also equally as difficult to measure. Apparently, my weird body shape is probably the main reason for measuring small. Carter was wedged up into my rib cage (even though he's dropped & head down) & I had to take a deep breath to open my rib cage & get him down a bit so she could measure. After a while, she got what she needed, told me that he was measuring fine, the amniotic fluid was good & everything looked great.

Huge relief. Huge, huge, huge.

I still go in tomorrow to see my OB to go over the results. I didn't think the tech would spill the beans (I didn't think they could), but I am so glad that she did. Now I can sleep well tonight, go about my day tomorrow as usual & look forward to a good visit with my awesome OB.

Round two
Bill's parents came back this week/weekend for another visit. They are on their first road trip as retired people, so they drove through Colorado for a visit during the first half & then came back again on their way home. This visit was a little more stressful than the last.

For some reason or another, Grandpa L thinks it's OK to smoke around Logan. I don't know where he got this idea because the "smoking rule" from day one was that he had to wash his hands & change his clothes if he wanted to hold Logan when he was a baby, to which Grandpa L decided that he just wouldn't hold him (nice, huh). The rules have never changed, however, he's been testing the limits at each visit as the years go by. It started with him lighting up while we were out walking around Downtown this last spring. Then there was the last visit where I had to keep telling Logan to stay away from Grandpa while he smoked in our backyard (which really made me angry).

This last Friday they came over for dinner. Grandma L was cutting up some fruit in the kitchen, Bill, Logan & Grandpa L were in the backyard grilling the burgers. I looked out of the sliding glass door & did a triple take. Grandpa L was standing by the grill & Logan was less than three feet away from his smoldering cigarette. I yelled to Logan from across the yard to come inside & to stay away from Grandpa while he smoked (he should be smoking in the front yard anyway - away from everyone). Grandpa L then has the balls to tell me, "It's OK. The wind is blowing in the other direction. He's fine because he's upwind". I almost lost it. "I don't care where the wind is blowing, it's too close for my comfort", I told him with much restraint. I then brought Logan inside while trying to heard him away from Grandpa L. After that, I guess Bill said something to him but I'm not sure what, but to the effect of don't smoke around our kids, I'm guessing.

So, for the rest of the visit Grandpa L was pissed because I don't want him smoking around us. I never told him he couldn't smoke (that's like telling the sun not to shine) & he has a place where he can go out of view & away from Logan in the driveway or the front yard. If this come up again in the next visit in October (after Carter is born), I will not hold back as much as I did this time.

The rest of the in-laws were their usual selves, Aunt Ju-Ju not being able to commit to a time & place for lunch, ultimately screwing up Bill's lunch hour & Grandma L being fake & also making some kind of interesting statements, comparing Logan to Cousin B (whatever). Nothing to open my mouth over.

Interestingly enough, the info-train with them has come to a complete stop. Since this is the last visit until after Carter is born, they still have not seen an ultrasound, they have no clue about the trip to labor & delivery a couple of weeks ago & they don't know that I'm measuring 4 weeks behind & need to go in tomorrow for another ultrasound. All they know is that we're having Carter at the end of September (hopefully not sooner). Maybe it would have been different if they actually tried to change the relationship, made a real apology, making an effort to respect our parenting choices & not being so cruel to me behind my back.

Talk about editing
We had a good time at the viewing party last night, even though Logan was being a Holy Terror, flipping out at the smallest things, not listening, you know - the usual. There were lots of people, lots of food & hey, as a pregnant woman, it was awesome to just hang out & graze. Yum!

The show started & we laughed. It wasn't as embarrassing or horrific as I thought it would be. Through the magic of editing, it was smooth & we looked like normal people, not the spastic idiot trying to "act" like I felt during filming. But editing, wow. They did a lot of it. No wonder why it took an entire year to air. Each "scene" was lightly scripted where we discusses what we were going to talk about, where we were going to stand, what our hands were going to do, etc. Each conversation was re-shot & we did at least five if not more takes for each scene. Then to watch the show & see that every single conversation was edited down to two or three words? Crazy.

But, it was a good show, a fun party & we had an awesome time. I think we'll get a good laugh out of Miami Vice carpet, "Antacid" Pink walls (because I couldn't say Pepto-Bismol) & swinging around poles in the basement for quite a while.